Communists Utilitarian Bikers of America

There is a certain slice of American biking soicety that seems to see the bicycle as a truely utilitarian method of transportation, similar perhaps to the communist thought that making a car cheaply would make it reliable.  From our diligent observations here at Drum Chicago, this sub sect of the biking community has little to no regard for the aesthetics of the rig which they pedal on a daily basis or, for that matter, the basic maintenance on said rig.  To wax poetic, perhaps these are the true "bicyclists", with no worry about whats cool or how fast it goes, just that it take them from point A to point B and perhaps even on the correct side of the road.  Because to them it doesn't matter if that rickety piece of crap is taking them to the grociery store, a socialist meeting (yeah we know that socialists and communists ain't the same, did you?) or the crack house, as long as the chain don't break its all good.
So today we salute the communist utilitarian bikers of America and declare that  hence forth November 1st will be know as Communist Utilitarian Bikers of America Day.    So Ride your bike that's too small, with your crusty derailers, one knoby and one smooth tire all over this fine country, and ride it proud!  And when some snot nosed kid on her/his super slick bike purchased with mommies money gives you guff... Tell 'em to piss off and that the gals/guys at Drums said this was their second favorite holiday of the year... just behind talk like a pirate day.